You have to feel to heal

One of my readers asked me to write an article about the concept of committing suicide slowly. I opted for the immediate suicide solution earlier in my life and thankfully didn’t succeed but I can relate to the concept of creating a slow death. 

I have given this subject considerable thought and yes it is possible to commit suicide over a period of time, even years. 

I think this was especially true years ago when it was much more frowned upon to express oneself. Also, no one would dare admit to having any psychological issues like depression and we didn’t even understand PTSD until somewhat recently! Although much more accepted these days, therapy is something that is still hidden, like we should be ashamed. Which I love when people are pro active with their mental health but yes, some people are still ignorant.

Fortunately most of society has come a long way but don’t think for a moment that people don’t still kill themselves slowly. They likely don’t see it as suicide but let’s discuss the official definition of suicide. The definitions are ‘the intentional taking of one’s own life’ or ‘the destruction of one’s own interests or prospects’.

What it doesn’t say is, the immediate taking of one’s own life.

We can kill ourselves slowly in any way that goes against caring for ourselves. Some people will take repeated risks, not like adventure seekers that love the adrenaline rush but risk takers that do dangerous things because they simply don’t care about themselves or care if they live or die. Even people who drink to excess or use drugs as a way to cope with their feelings. This is separate from addiction, that is not a topic I’m going to address here.

I’m talking about the idea of self-medicating. Self medicating by abusing alcohol or drugs is a method of suicide in that whether people want to admit it or not, it’s harmful to themselves. Those things take a repeated toll on one’s body and mind, killing a little at a time. 

You might say, other people take medication for depression so how is that different. It is different because of the steps a person takes to find the proper medication. Number one, people that get prescribed medication for depression are taking an active role in expressing themselves and opening themselves up to healing. They haven’t given up on putting forth the significant effort it takes to battle whatever is holding us down.

People who look to things like drugs, alcohol or risky behavior are looking to bury their feelings. Here’s the biggest problem with that; feeling is a fact of life. You can’t heal until you allow  yourself to feel! Self medicating is one of the biggest pitfalls of mental health, because you will always find yourself at a point where you need more to feel less. 

There’s also those that aren’t harmful to themselves in an obvious way and they aren’t actively doing anything. They literally do nothing. They don’t live and they don’t die. They just wait to die. I suspect my grandmother was like that. She just emotionally “checked out” one day and waited while doing nothing for her physical end to come. 

Perhaps that is one of the reasons I wrote my book and these articles because I want to reach out to anyone that is struggling to heal and inspire them to take steps in learning self-love, and finding their passion for life. It’s important to love yourself, so you can trust yourself.